CHAPTER 3



They know each other; of course he'll show her some attention, Pam said to herself, trying to get herself to stop thinking of Nika. They're friends. This bothered her even more.

She got up out of bed and shuffled down the hall to the bathroom to take her birth control pill. Banking on marriage and family so early in life. What a crazy dream. She opened the door to the bathroom cabinet. There's no time for that now. The book's the thing. That's what I should be thinking about. That's the key to success. That's my focus. She pulled out the pill from the package and swallowed it.

She returned to her bedroom to get ready for the early morning shift. What about that Tim guy? Geez, always waiting after some guy. If it weren't for the fact that I need a publisher, I'd publish the thing myself and get it over with.

Meanwhile, Tim had been up since 4:42 A.M. that morning, way before his alarm clock normally rang. His mind couldn't stop thinking. Don't get your hopes up too high. She might already be dating someone. Or maybe she'll think you're a complete dork. No! She must never think I'm a dork! "Dork"-- do they still use that word? I can't just ask her out. I barely know her. And it looks tacky-- a complete stranger asking a woman out in a donut shop. And if I hang around too much, I'll look like one of those lonely people who hang out at restaurants because they have nothing better to do with their lives.

He noticed Pebbles on the floor. She looked at him as if she could read his mind. " You don't have to agree with me, you know."

To escape from his irrepressible thoughts, he sat up to get ready for the day. He showered. Twice. With lots of soap. Then he shaved. Twice. He ate. Twice. He wasn't hungry for his morning muffin any more, but that was immaterial. He puttered around the house checking his features every time he passed a mirror. He turned on the tv every fifteen minutes out of boredom to watch the day's headlines and practically had them memorized. He sat down to pray the rosary. Today was the Sorrowful mysteries. The first sorrowful mystery: The Agony in the Garden.

He suddenly felt a surge of nervousness and his chest tightened. He cracked his knuckles. He desperately hoped she was the one, but he had a fatal flaw when it came to dating: he had opinions. The wrong ones. Too many of them.

It would have been bad enough to have simply have faith-- faith of any kind. Faith turned off so many people. But he had the most repellant of all faiths-- the Catholic faith. And he was a staunch Catholic. Most other faiths believed that some form of contraception was okay, and that divorce was okay. Some even endorsed abortion, same-sex unions, female clergy, euthanasia. And so on. But his was the strictest of all major religions. His was considered the most irrelevant.

No one ever made a big deal of his faith, because he never made a big deal of it. His co-workers noticed the rosary laced around the picture of his parents on his desk. They knew there were certain topics that they couldn't bring up around him because he was a little quaint in his thinking. But he never bellowed his opinions; he just said "I'm Catholic" and proved his devotion with his Miraculous Medal.

With dating it was different. He wanted to make a big deal about his religion. He could shield that part of himself to his co-workers, and even to his friends, to a certain extent. But he had to be able to be himself with the woman he wanted to marry. What if she thinks I'm a complete twit? It'd be really embarrassing if she was this Fundamentalist Christian who thought I was going to hell for being Catholic, or if she was raised with lesbian parents or something like that.

As he wondered how he would bring up the topic of religion, a knot started to form in his stomach. Oh, this couldn't be. This couldn't be torpedoed because of religion. She had to be a wholesome girl. She looked it. She had to be. This had to be out in the open on the first date, he thought. There was no point in pursuing this relationship if she wasn't ready to accept his Catholicism.

He began to recite his prayers earnestly.

When he finished his rosary it was 7:16 AM. Usually he left the house at 7:30 AM, but his stomach fluttered at the thought of Pam. He grabbed his jacket set off for Maxine's.



Pam looked up at the window pane and was glad to see Tim walking in. The worst of the morning rush hour was still about fifteen minutes away, and the line-up was relatively short. The next customer, a hurried banker-type, gave her his order: medium coffee, two sugars, two creams and a danish to go. She then looked at Cate. "Are you working tomorrow? "

Cate glared at her. "No. It's written on the schedule in the back room. "

" Right, " Pam answered, feigning ignorance. " I forgot." Pam was extra careful in pouring the customer's coffee. " I'm working tomorrow night at the supper hour."

" I know, I read the schedule, " Cate answered, annoyed. What a time to start a conversation, she thought.

" Are you doing anything this weekend?"

" Nothing special. " She hurried up to get the customer's danish.

" I was just wondering about seeing Bastille at the Cineplex."

Cate winced. It was a violent movie about the French Revolution. "Uh--- no, " she declined.

" Well, I have no one to see it with. Everybody's busy, " she moped lightheartedly.

" Could we have a little less chit-chat, please, I'm on a tight schedule, " demanded the banker-type.

Pam handed him his order with a smile. Mission accomplished.

Tim came up to the front of the line but couldn't think of anything clever or intelligent to say. He kicked himself for the missed opportunity, but was too afraid of making a mistake to say anything.

That was a big mistake, he said to himself. A bigger mistake than not saying anything at all. Big mistake, big mistake. The only way to rectify that mistake is to actually not miss the next opportunity to talk to her. What to say to her?

Didn't she say she wanted to see that movie, Bastille and she had no one to go with? Maybe she's actually desperate enough to go with me. Is she? Only one way to find out. *Gulp*.

The following afternoon, at 4:27 PM, Tim stared out the seventh-storey window of his cubicle and unrolled the fourth antacid of that day and popped it into his mouth. He began to busy himself by clearing his desk of unnecessary papers, rearranging his office supplies and turning off his computer. He slid his chair into the desk and checked the floor for paper clips or staples that may have fallen to the ground during the course of the day.

He stood and surveyed his office space, and when he was satisfied, he grabbed his jacket on his coat rack. He turned around and checked again. Yep. Still clean. He then noticed a thread of lint on the carpet. next to the wastepaper basket. Its presence annoyed him. He went over and threw the offending piece of litter into the garbage. He stood back. Now, that's perfect. Then he felt disappointed that there was no more mess to pick up. Maybe if he had a can of Pledge he could dust something.

Get with it, he said to himself.

As he walked to the elevator, he remembered he still had one thing to do: feed Pebbles. She would be hungry. It would've been cruel to leave her starve because of some potential love interest. She has a great big bowl of Cat Chow, he counter-argued.

But that water must be stale. Or maybe she drank it all alreaedy.

She can drink from the toilet if she's desperate.

The toilet? YUCK!

I think there are some rinsed dishes in the sink with water in them. She can drink from

that. Yeah, the dishes weren't too dirty. They were pretty clean even when I rinsed them..

The elevator was slow in coming. Come on, come on, stupid piece of junk.

It opened its doors and Tim walked in. It took him to the main floor, and he walked

straight to the main entrance.

The clouds hung over and the air was stiff with moisture, like a light perspiration. Now what. He took a breath, then started off for Maxine's.

He braced himself as he approached the sign and could dimly see Pam through the window. She's there! Woohoo! I'm not too early. The other girl she was working with went into the backroom. He lowered his face and quickly crossed himself.

There was only one other customer in the store. Tim stood a foot from the counter and looked at the menu above, but he was too nervous to read anything.

" Hi there, " Pam said.

Pam was as radiant as the first time he saw her. He loved her stick-straight auburn hair and her straight white teeth and the perky little glint in her eyes.

She gave the other customer his order and he left the shop.

" I'll have a…" He tried to appear as if he were having trouble deciding. " I'll have a roast-beef sandwich and a Coke."

"That'll be $5.75".

He didn't have the nerve to do the change bit again, so he pulled out a twenty from his wallet.

" And will that be to go?" Pam asked.

" No, " replied Tim. Feeling he needed to justify his presence, he added, " I haven't read the paper today, so I thought I'd take advantage of it here."

" Well, it's all yours, " said Pam as she pointed to the newspaper holder that was stuck to the trash bin in the corner. She turned grabbed a tray and put it on the glass counter, then stuck a napkin in it. She then pulled out a kaiser bun and cut it in half with a large knife.

" And what would you like on your sandwich ? " she asked in a sweet voice.

" Uh, what would I like…"

" Mustard or mayonnaise? " replied Pam.

" Um, mayonnaise, please. And everything on it. I want to get my money's worth, " he said as he put his hands in his pocket. Pam squeezed the mayonnaise bottle onto the kaiser slice.

Would you like some cream cheese with that?"

"Is it extra?" asked Tim.

" Uh-uh."

" Then spread it on as thick as you can, " he requested.

" Will do. " She scooped up a gob with her knife and smeared it on the top bun. She flipped the bun over and pressed it onto the rest of the sandwich, then cut it with her sharp knife. "Here you go, " she said as she raised the plate to the counter. " Bon appetit."

"Thanks, " said Tim with a smile.

The tightness in his chest let up somewhat. Wow, she seems like a really nice girl, he thought. He carried the tray to the table that faced the glass counter. When Pam wasn't looking, he wiped his hand on his knees, then went to get the newspaper.

He glanced at the headlines for interesting stories to read, slowly turning the pages. He wasn't really hungry, but he took a bite out of his sandwich. As he came nearer to the end of the newspaper, he realized he was going to have to bring up the subject of movies.

Pam confidently went about her business, tidying up the counter and refreshing the coffee. When she heard him sipping the last dregs of his Coke, she called out "would you like some coffee, sir?"

Sir? He repeated in disbelief to himself. " Please, don't call me 'sir'. The name's Tim," he said. Oh good, now she knows my name.

"Okay Tim, how about some coffee?"

" Is it free?"

Pam's smile dimmed. "No, " she said.

" Oh, I'll have one anyway."

She poured him a cup and he went to the counter to get it.

" What're you reading? " she asked.

Tim was never one to lie. " I was just about to get to the entertainment section, maybe read up on a movie called 'Bastille'. Have you seen it?"

" I haven't unfortunately, " Pam replied sounding glum. " I was going to go see it weekend, but I have homework to do. "

Tim lifted his head. "Oh." He turned around and his face sagged. " I guess school keeps you pretty busy, huh?"

"Well, yeah, " she said. " I was really hoping to squeeze in a movie. It's like I have no life anymore. "

" I know what you mean, " thought Tim out loud as he sat down.

"Does your job keep you busy? " Pam asked sounding interested.

"Actually, no. I mean, there's work to do, but once I come home I…I don't do much."

" I bet your family must keep you busy."

" Well, I live alone, actually."

"Alone? You mean you're not married? " Pam said with surprise.

"N-No, " Tim stuttered, stifling a smile.

She put her hand on her hip, " I was sure you were married. And I'm rarely mistaken about people."

Tim leaned onto the table. "No, I'm not married. I'm very single."

" That sucks."

" Yes, yes it does."

" It doesn't get any easier."

No kidding, thought Tim. His mouth watered and he swallowed. "Um, so you wouldn't uh, be interested in doing anything this weekend, huh? " he managed to say nervosly.

" Well, I don't know, I could be talked into doing something for the right opportunity, " replied Pam.

" Like maybe a movie?" he proposed meekly.

" You mean like Bastille? " she asked.

Tim leaned back and folded his arms hesitantly. " That could be a good movie to go see. "

" Well, there's a problem, " said Pam.

"What's that?" he wondered.

" You don't even know my name, " she answered.

Tim froze. " So we can't go?"

She laughed. "My name is Pam, Pamela Goldstein." She extended her hand.

" I'm Tim-- but you know that. I'm Tim Stapleton. "

"Pleased to make your acquaintance. "

" So would you be interested… " he said bobbing his head from side to side , " in seeing Bastille?"

" This weekend? " Pam uttered with surprise, as if caught off guard. " I think-- I think I could maybe fit in that into my schedule. I've been pretty anxious to see it, and I hate seeing movies by myself."

Oh my God! She said yes! Tim exclaimed in his head. I think…Yes-- I think, I think that was an acceptance, he reassured himself. At least tentatively. "So when would be a good time for you? "

Pam hummed and rolled up upwards. " I think tomorrow night would be good. Should we have dinner afterwards?"

" Yeah, that would be great, " said Tim, breaking into a smile. " Where would you like to eat? "

" We can decide after the movie, " said Pam. " I don't have a car, so…"

" I could pick you up at your place.What time would you like me to show up?"

" How about the 7 o'clock?"

" Sounds good. "

They finalized the details of their date. They exchanged phone numbers and she gave him her address. Tim took a last sip of his coffee. "I'll see you tomorrow. "

Tim could not believe his luck. Okay Tim, now, let's not blow it. This might be your only shot, he thought. The night air became light as the rain let up. The streets resounded with refreshing sounds of cars sizzling on the wet asphalt. He would be going to her apartment. Woohoo! This was his lucky day. His heart was so overjoyed, his soul naturally raised itself to God and thanked him for the opportunity, and he prayed that he could carry out his will, and that Pam would be the woman of his dreams, the woman destined to marry him and share his vocation of marriage.

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