Oh how I too understand. I am been fighting depression for a long time as well. I believe our monthly hormones have to deal with our depression.(monthly cycle)
I just want you to know you are just where you need to be to grow more spiritually. It takes the feeling of being let down to address God head on how you feel. He wants you to come to Him address your problem with how you feel about where you are in this illness. I did this in my early twenties when I had a major time low in my life, very suicidal. I told him just how I felt. It felt good to talk Him. He and I drew closer in that time. It was not loud and clear but a still small voice and I praise God for that time. Don't give up on praise music, reading your bible and going to church. This is what God uses to reach out to us.
We have to believe His word and His word says in Romans 8:28 "And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose."
Well all means all. It means that all our depression is some how going to be working things out for the good. In times of despair we don't understand. But please know you are on the right path of not always being in despair. Your medicine will help and hopefully you start walking a bit through the week. Also eat good foods and you will be having brighter days.
Just like I shared with another sister up above, God can use depression. There were people in the Bible that were depressed. He used them and He was among them. He is among you. The enemy loves to lie to us in the midst of despair, and we need to stop listening to the lies.
I hope you will come back and we all can have a little support group here. We need each other. May God strength you today.
