I've been feeling this intense struggle lately. I know that there is a definite spiritual component to it as my husband and I are ministering to more people and that we sense that the Lord may be calling us to another country for long-term ministry. The though excites me and scares me. I'm very afraid to go to another country with chemical depression. I'm not even sure if I can get a years supply of medication. I know in my heart that if the Lord is calling me, He will equip me. I have been on various medications for the past 11 years. They work well for a while and then stop and I have to switch. I'm frustrated with this and have been asking the Lord again to heal me. I know He can, but it may not be His will and I have learned to accept it. Please pray for me.
Liz
Hi Liz,
I know exactly how you feel. Having clinical depression restricts us in ways that physical ailments don't.
Most of the time when we have physical problems, we know what to expect but with depression, you never know when it's going to attack, get worse or the meds stop working. It's scary stepping out of our comfort, secure zone.
Yes, pray that the Lord heals you. If He doesn't, He knows you will need assurance before you travel, especially to a foreign country so, just expect Him to provide it. Peter never walked on the water because he presumed the Lord would keep him from drowning, he waited until Christ told him to come. Even when he started to doubt, it was the Lord that saved Him. Peter just cried out, "save me" and the Lord did the rest (Matt 14:28-31). Sometimes, we think faith is stepping out and doing something on our own but it's not, it's simply obeying the Lord as He directs our steps. We don't make the way, He does. Even when our faith is small, He still accomplishes His perfect will in our lives.
Liz, if it's His will you go, don't fret. He will provide the assurance and faith that you need. That assurance might come in a way where you are able to get a years meds, or there will be a Dr close by where ever it is you are going. Whatever, He will give you what you need if you are to go.
I'll be praying for you.
laura
Thank you Laura for your words of encouragement.
You are an awesome sister in Christ and a blessing to many.
It is such a comfort to know that you and others with clinical depression understand. We don't have to "fix" each other, that is God's job.
I pray that we will all continue to persevere and fight the good fight. Our treasure is surely in Heaven and not on earth.
Your sister in Christ.
Liz
